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Thursday, December 28, 2006
WHO CARES LARH WHO CARES~!? deathgod,pls write my name down i cant take it anymore wadeva,whoever doesnt matter anymore doesnt matter anymore why am i here *bang head* can define 'happiness' for me .. i cant understand and feel it AT ALL first time in my life that i m so disapppointed with everything nothing holds me back do u noe how it feels to have nobody to speak to ..absolutely nobody .. or i shld saying .. talking is useless to me .. the pain had deeply etched in the heart nothing cures .. i could hear nothing that helps ..nobody can understand the pain .. a secret that cant be told ..its painfully kept in the heart ..=\ nobody cares .. even her nobody .. yeah im a nobody .
11:38 PM
why is everyone feeling so frustrated ? i admit that im one of them too .. i feel frustrated about almost everything .. im angry at the bias-ism that some humanbeings have for their special somebody .. dunoe wad i mean .. its okay ,cos it doesnt matter =) watched DEATHNOTE TWO today and its a nice ,2hr+ show . i highly recommended it too.. eh nothing much for today .. actually .. i really have no idea what to say abt human beings + this world, for now .. ifeel that .. everyone is disappointing me, especially myself .. i dunoe what the hell i am doing right now .. PLAYING WITH MY FUTURE ?> I seriously think so .. i slacked my holiday till now ........NOW and my holiday is ending in ................. countable with ONLY one hand .. should i slap myself to senses .. or should i continue to be in my holiday mood ,while knowing that my doom is near why should human be born with a heart ,when sometimes they neglect what their hearts felt .. when their brains will rule over their hearts .. when pple do things that are heart-breaking ~? heart is only an organ to keep the blood(full of evil) circulating in the evil empty vessel of human ..thus, the heart is the origin of evil ... i learned sth .. when someone is born with that kind of attitude, theres no way to change it ..its just a wishful thinking that leopards can actually change their spots ..thus, i will have no more comment on pple's flaws ,unless someone starts discussing abt it .. maybe i shld not be a nosey parker pple treat my concerns as 'humanshit'.. now they are losing it , im here laughing like its none of my business .. perhaps life is easier when u just let everything go .. just be someone unexpected and u may gain something u expected being rebellious is,may be, a easy way out for me .. sorry , u have called the wrong person may .. =)
10:13 PM
shut down .. SILENCE pls , further toking wun help anymore tired, and dun wish to move on .. let this christmas be a silent one .. + hope the NEW yr can wash away all the pains .. new year resolution = a change in me
11:43 AM
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
if u have fate with somebody, you can never avoid that person .. well..some things are that coincidental .. i met one PRIMARY sch friend IN MAPLE.. goodness. how can u believe such things happening, when there are only 4 worlds, 20 channels and more than 100 maps in ONE CHANNEL.. i believe this got to do with the affinity~! haha luckily she used her name as her maple nick,otherwise i wun be able to recognise her too =). . wahh i feel so happy ,when life is full of miracles and surprises .. also..a reminder to myself`-its time to start doing my work
4:21 PM
Monday, December 25, 2006
so happy can !? im happpy just over a simple thing - my blog has snowflakes + song agn \ WOOOHOOOO ! lol ~ its a miracle ,really o.o despite so many popups + virus , ithink =) anyway... this christmas is not that lonely, when i m being accompanied by a few friends .. thats enough o.o since to me ,christmas doesnt have a significant place in my heart o.o haha its just a simple celebration,where teenagers will scream their hearts out, and have their wildest night with their friends in a joyous mood o.o for me ,its just another day ,where we have the reason/excuse to go to the restaurants for a sumptuous meal =) to be frank, i dun really have e mood to celebrate o.o it just seems ridiculous to celebrate it,while u aint a christian .. YES ,i agree that im quite rational at times .. that it is beginning to irritate myself too .. HOW I WISH i can go mad during the christmas party ,and sing the carols out LOUD ...but the lyrics is the one that stops me from singing .. its like ,how can u happily sing abt things that u have doubts abt -.- i have been REALLY ungrateful this year .. i admit that i have slacked this whole yr round by not buying present for anyone .. even for myself o.o ..hais .. im so sorry if i din get presents for YOU =) ..so so sorry =\ i just dun have the mood for anything =\ ,not even neoprints now =( have i lost myself o.o haa anyway .. have a MERRY CHRISTMASS =) opps =)
1:14 PM
Friday, December 22, 2006
goodness .. happy belated birthday to minjie wong ..too ~ =X .. i told u o.o
4:24 PM
AIYER ~ how come im remembering the things i hope to forget , AND forgetting the things i hope to remember the irony~
1:47 PM
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
sometimes .. YOU JUST CANT BE THE ONE U WANT TO BE .. i a m j u s t a w a n n a b e . . . thats my life i realised this truth long time ago .. and its getting more and more .. obvious by the age of 17 CRAP see im trying to be poetic here YOU are draining my confidence away anyway, im back from THAT pasir ris chalet .. rainy days turn me on MORE actually .. ESCAPE makes me wanna PUKE call me a weakling ~ haha ,just nothing ,but a weako MIND YOU a rotten apple can be a diamond in somebody's eyes
7:11 PM
- - - - - - - negative .. anyway, HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY ,YINGHUI..~! lalala
6:53 PM
Sunday, December 17, 2006
2mr is gonna be a BIG day for some of us .. o.o well for me ,its the start of my 3days,2 nights CHALET o.o i dunoe what will happen ,and i wun want to know what will happen ... =) for now ,im just so HAPPY that my FLASH can finally work alrd .. HEEE =) but damn maplestory .. i died 3 times in a day .. i guess -.- REDUNDANT time spent in maple man .. my % is still STUCK at 61% -.- goodness me .. im being so ambitious and daring ? that i THOUGHT i can kill those bossy,high lvled mons -.- nvm .. since its just a game .. nothing interesting seems to happen ,yet i feel so much things happening -.- *theres a fly irritating me right now..!!! feel like slapping it down the table so much* yah~ so .. the number of FRIENDS ,who will DEFINATELY turn up for the chalet , is PATHETIC .. however, we nv change the idea of having a chalet haha cos no matter wad ,there will owalse be the 4 of us (i guess ?) .. ZZ REALLY not sure if the bbq on the first chalet night will turn out smoothly -.- everything is YET bought -.- ..ah~ xcept for the wings that my mum bought + seasoned -.- sian .. they have decided to buy ALL the INGREDIENTS tomorrow and go down straight to pasir ris .. HA how 'shun bian' huh o.o human beings is such an .. irony mammal ~ they can cleverly point out others' flaws while ,stupidly blinded by their own flaws o.o goodness~ -.- that explains why i haben pack my bag for chalet -.- gosh my procrastination skill is at MASTER level o.o ..
10:26 PM
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
HAHA im quite surprised that there are still pple visiting my blog, despite all those SICKENING POPUPS .. due to some VIRUS I THINK arhhh !!! anyway.. my 2 lovable friends, ling ling and yu yu (LOL) quarrelled few days ago ~ well, their common character-stubborness is the root of this arguement ..LUCKILY there is no COLD WAR .. otherwise i will be so DEAD man, as in i will be in a VERY erm ..awkward situation since i have no idea who to side .. (but most likely i will side my lingling ><) as yuyu is really in the wrong larh .. i shall not elaborate on it .. HAHA since its OVER ! haah my ling ling has THIS REALLY .. erm .. BIG HEART? ..aw not sure if its the right phrase to describe her let-bygones-be-bygones attitude >< .. if i were lingling , i will be damn angry with that person, till i hear "sorry" from that person's mouth .. haha EVIL i know .. im not someone ,who can forgive pple so easily ..but.. HEY , my attitude towards different pple will also depend larh +) well, i gonna say the same thing agn .. TREAT ME THE WAY U WANT ME TO TREAT U =) i still love to joke around wif my friends .. afterall, i dun wan to be a stern, serious person at all times .. thus .... BRING ON ALL UR JOKES o.o lalalalalala chalet + christmas is coming o.o .. goodness .. im looking forward to the buffet( any kind ) more [hopefully theres one =\] than the christmas or chalet neh .. although the idea of chalet really excites me ,i wonder if it will proceed smoothly -.- i hope to blog more .. HEEE since .. MY HOLIDAYS IS COMING ... WEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! cant u see how happy i am !? maybe im nacho-ing/mos-burging/milk-tea-ing/takoyaki_balling TOMORROW .. and ............. i may NOT pon my thurs lec (which is 2mr). which is like FINALLY !!! yeah!! finally i can attend a session of digi lecture before my semester break starts! YAYAY lets pray hard and hope for a muscle + suave model for tomorrow, LAST DRAWING tutorial ?! yesh i shld have motivation to do my contour drawing/sketches after i bathe =) *BLOW BUBBLES ~*
10:46 PM
Friday, December 08, 2006
=( sucha pain in the neck @@ everything irritates mi once again i miss those slacky days =( im shocked that some will still claim that im slacking, even when i did put in effort .. oh, so in their eyes, i have only been slacking thru-out my semesters ..hais.. no wonder ,to them, my artpieces will always seem to be ridiculous and infeior ,when compared with theirs .. to be frank, i have REALLY NO IDEA about basically EVERYTHING.. sometimes, i doubt if i have really lived on this earth b4.. have my 17 yrs of breathing gone down the drain? have i .. taken the past 17 yrs for granted ? ha wateva . reflections reflections.. i always told myself to reflect.. yet, my words are always louder than my actions ZZ anyway, i will be having a chalet on 18 dec ..im not so looking forward to it .. when all the bbq stuffs keep on bugging us .. when joyce keeps onn asking how ,how HOW .. and i get so irritated with all these things and wanted to throw everything aside by saying ,"I DONT KNOW" ~ just LEAVE ME ALONE,. gdness me, i totallly dont have the mood to participate in all these chalet thingy =( hais @@ whats more christmas is coming~ omgosh, how am i going to celebrate this joyous day with this rotten mood o.o more sleepless nights to go~ .. panda eyes
11:08 PM
oh am i not being me .. have been staying up late ( can be as late as 4/5am ) and can actuallly forgo my beauty sleep .. ZZZZ im not being me .. i have cut down my nuggets intake to once per wk .. WOW im so surprised that i can actually resist the temptation, despite walking past THAT canteen for almost every weekday -.- finally, i managed to have enjoy my lard-ful nuggets, LOL ..and im quite happy actually =\ perhaps ,.................... i wun care abt the lard issue much .. haha living on this earth is tiring o.o haha anyway.......... one more reason of me not being me is .. i have not touched those neoprint machines for MONTHS o.o hais although i know its just a waste of $, i wanna try out those new machines leh ~~ they are like my .. forever upgrading,young adult toy .. -.- HAIS .. haha moreover, nowadays ,i have been looking thru my neoprints ,and really realised that .. i have changed .. HAHA my forehead is forever that high o.o (which makes me look bald) but i had managed to .. hide this weakness with my so called fringe -.- also, i realised that i cant stop smiling when im neoprinting .. even if i was told to act/show that im scared -.-im such a poor actor ><> oh yeah~ i have a new, temporary tutor for my drawing module .. well, the previous one is better ,and she is coming back in january ! ( after visiting her mum + her eye operation =) ) ..the models,who are posing for our drawing module, are putting on more and more clothings -.- and they made it harder for us to draw . For instance, the model ,whom we had yesterday, wore a oversized t-shirt ( how can we see the shape of the body then -.-!!) and a knee length shorts -.- hais ..i tot models are supposed to reveal most of their body parts (except for their private part -.- of cos) ,so to aid us in our gesture drawing .. HAIS .. a much greater disapppointment of the models ,as the weeks past -.- i want to look at their six packs ! ha =) craapping =)
10:06 AM
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
EH IM LATE TODAY .. TERRBILY LATE LATE LATE!! thank goodness my grandma woke me up at 8pm .. otherwise, i will REALLY absent for that 2 hrs lec ,for NO reason ..although ,yes , theres a reason.. well ~ haha -.- these few weeks was as hectic as it could possibly be for me-.- ZZ i can HARDLY lie on my bed -.- ZZ ,which resulting in not having gd sleep for the past few wks -.- terrible really -.- haha finally, my burden is beginning to lessen YET those 'redoing-of-assignments' nightmare came back and bug me once agn... SIAN why must i owalse redo my assignment for almost every single module .. thats really disheartening and tedious to do the same ,old things over and over again .. not to mention, the fear of being rejected .. REJECTING REJECTIONS .. i once typed that in my msn nick before .. as i got really fed up for redoing ..ZZZ they will only pile up and contribute to my workload -.- while the others are relaxing -.- ZZZ HAIS when can i break this vicious cycle ? not sure if it is one .. hais nvm .. i wanna dl the newest version of flash heeee my current flash is giving my some problems . sick im bz hee .. poof ~ off to do my work~
9:39 PM
Monday, December 04, 2006
my day = worst case scenario .. !!! unlucky incidents will usually come one after another .. first ,is virus attacking my things .. now~ even my lappie and printer are rebelling ,by malfunctioning .. HEY !!! I M RUNNING OUT OF TIME~ PLEASE STOP THIS JOKE ~ -.- argh .. its not the time to tear .. i will buck up and turn this sickening situation around~!! damn everything lol
10:46 AM
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